I WOULD BE ADMONISHED, "THAT WAS THIRTY YEARS AGO" BUT THE LOWERING OF MY BOTTOM LINE TO ZERO DOLLARS REMAINS THERE, IT IS ALWAYS A LOWER STARTING POINT.
WORSE, IS THE LOSS OF OPPORTUNITY. SIXTY YEARS AGO, WHEN I WAS EIGHTEEN I HAD A TEN TO FOURTEEN THOUSAND DOLLAR TRUST FROM MY PATERNAL GRANDFATHER. I WAS GOING TO PURCHASE AN ELEVEN ROOM HOTEL WITH A CAFETERIA/DANCE HALL AND A LOUNGE. I WOULD HAVE STARTED IN BUSINESS FROM THAT LUCRATIVE ENTERPRISE. I CERTAINLY WOULD NOT HAVE SUFFERED THE LIFELONG LACK OF DISPOSABLE INCOME I EXPERIENCED.
I HAD OVER A MILLION DOLLARS I WAS BEQUEATHED STOLEN FROM ME THIRTY AND FORTY YEARS AGO, I STILL THINK ABOUT THOSE LOSSES. THE DESTRUCTION OF THE EXPERIENCE THAT NOT HAVING MONEY TO INVEST IN PROJECTS CAUSED IS ANGUISHING.
THE INTERFERENCE IN MY LIFE WHICH MY EX-WIFE CREATED DESTROYED MY MUSIC PROJECT TO OBTAIN TOP LEVEL EMPLOYMENT AS A MUSICIAN. I WORKED FOR TWENTY FIVE YEARS AND I WAS BECOMING KNOWN AS A MUSICIAN. MY EX-WIFE, GONE FOR YEARS, EMPLOYED LAWYERS AND POLICE TO MAKE SURE I WOULD NOT BE ABLE TO LEAVE HOME.
THERE WAS A CONCERTED EFFORT TO DISPOSSESS ME OF MY HOME BY SEIZING IT UNDER COLOR OF LAW.
NO ONE WOULD EVER HOUSE SIT FOR ME AFTER THE POLICE STARTED COMING IN NINETEEN NINETY TWO. I WOULD WORRY WHEN I LEFT THE HOUSE THAT ANOTHER SEIZURE WOULD BE ATTEMPTED, NOBODY WOULD BE HERE AND I WOULD NOT GET BACK INTO MY HOUSE AGAIN.
I HAVE TO LAY IMMOBILE FOR LONG PERIODS OF TIME TO RECOVER FROM THE VIRTUAL PARALYSIS I EXPERIENCE.
I REALIZED LATELY THAT I AM BEHIND ON MY NECESSARY CHORES AND I WILL TEND TO GET UP TOO SOON AS I GET OVER SHORT OR LONG TERM PARALYSIS WHICH PREVENTS RECOVERY FROM LASTING VERY LONG OR HAPPENING.
COLLAPSE AND TONIC IMMOBILITY DEVELOPMENT
There is a problem with those who seek to diminish the experience of others. If you are not producing or conveying something of benefit to others, those whom you are affecting, what use are you and what do you think you are doing? There is no " higher purpose " which makes damaging acts acceptable.
Tonic Immobility and Tonic Collapse are the result of extremely stressful, not able to be resisted attacks, likely starting during childhood. Attacking or calling up an attacking force which makes Lindon collapse and stay that way for years is horribly bad criminal behavior which destroys life experience.