NO, I AM NOT TOUGH. I AM LIKE A DRAGON FLY, LARGE AND AGILE BUT VERY FRAGILE.

 The thousands of attacks, many of them accompanied by flopping on me, by my Mother created what she wanted, complete paralyzed submission. This conditions a collapse response instead of a proper "Fight" response. I gather from other people, as they say so, that the situations which cause me to collapse would not bother them. 

When you find out much later about a huge loss, what can you do but go paralyzed with anguish?

This is the view from Mount Royal about ten minutes back then by car from where I was born.

Mount Royal was right above, bottom left. Uncle Albert's house which I was to inherit was ten minutes away at the top right. 

The other thing which strikes me is the unnecessary stealing by fully supported women. They continually hampered high minded projects such as writing, music and art. Even socialist, environmentally protective political discourse was hampered by the Women lying disparagingly about what thoughts I allegedly had. even accusing mental defect when the Women's whole "Thing", lying, punishing ,seizing, hampering  is a mental defect. Huge life depreciating actions were carried out by My Family Women for frivolous reasons.

to Rebecca

That Mental Case my brother Andrew came here once and I was practicing.

He said `` I have never seen anyone so self involved ``. I sent you that 

Women In Control of Men Article. He was a part of it. The women made him

into A SUBMISSIVE MENTAL CASE AND THEY WANTED THAT FOR ME TOO.

The loss of experience I suffered as a result is crushing to contemplate.

Betty crowed that she had joined up with the people who destroyed my land to swap false stories about me and spread them around. The Women in my family did not do anything productive, they just manipulated power for themselves by actions which were always destructive.

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MY TRUTHFUL AND LAWFUL RESTRICTIONS SHOULD NOT DISADVANTAGE ME

TOTAL RECALL IS LIKE DIGITAL VIDEO

TOTAL RECALL AND THE ARBERY TRIAL

See how the Digital Recordings expose Liars and provide both subtle and gross indications of what happened, even off camera.

I have always had a photographic memory. My childhood was rife with misrepresentation, fraud, theft, lies and liars. It was necessary to remember what was said, particularly by myself, and what was said to me. Photographic and audio memory both would be necessary to know what really had happened.

I might have developed Cinematographic Memory as a result of practicing the documentation of Lyrics created as a root verse or as additional or improved verses extemporized during Live Music Practice or Performance and of course while composing.

The necessity of dealing with false accusers, trespassers, accident injury perpetrators and raiders created more situations where accurate recall was necessary.

Then along came Windows and Movie Maker and Animation Software million movies had a filing and retrieval system.

HEY, HERE I COME IN THE BC SUPREME  COURT YOU LYING FUCKING BASTARDS!

Chimney, roof and appliance 18' below

 

THE TERRIBLE ECONOMIC SITUATION CREATED THROUGH TAKEOVERS

I WAS REPEATEDLY FORCED TO STOP DOING WHAT I WAS WORKING AT.

WHEN I WAS WORKING FOR SEVEN YEARS AS A CNR EMPLOYEE, THE JOB WAS WHAT I HAD. I WAS NOT ONLY DEFRAUDED OF MY OUT OF WORK INSURANCE AND MY WAGE LOSS BUT THE LAWWHORES ALL AGREED, THEY KNEW I WAS NO GOOD AND WAS GOING TO BE FIRED, THEY SAID DESPITE THE YARDMASTER TESTIFYING THAT I WAS INCREDIBLY RELIABLE AND REALLY FAST.

THE LAWYERS AND THE JUDGE MADE A DEAL WITHOUT ME BEING INVOLVED. THEY DID NOT BELIEVE ME AND MADE THE DEAL. THE TESTIMONY AT TRIAL WAS TOO LATE. DEAL ALREADY MADE.

EVERY ACCIDENT AND EVERY EXTORTION SCHEME BROUGHT WHAT I WAS WORKING AT TO AN END.

THERE WAS NOTHING FOR ME TO GAIN BY ENGAGING IN CONFLICT ON OR OVER MY JOB OR LATER, OVER MY SOLELY OWNED  PROPERTY. THE CONFLICT CONTRIBUTED TO MAKE THE DAMAGE DONE WORSE.

FOR THERE TO BE ANYTHING TO GAIN BY ACTING TO DISPOSSESS ME, I HAVE TO HAVE EARNED OR RETAINED SOMETHING OF VALUE. I HAVE DEMONSTRATED MY RATIONAL COMPETENCE THROUGH ASSET RETENTION.

PERSONS WHO HAVE NOT DEMONSTRATED ANY FORM OF COMPETENCE WILL IRRATIONALLY BE PERMITTED TO DECLARE THAT I AM CRAZY  BASED ON WHAT THEY CLAIM I THINK. UNDER CROSS EXAMINATION IT WILL BE OBVIOUS THAT MY  ACCUSERS DO NOT EVEN KNOW WHAT THEY WERE THINKING. THE ATTACKING WAS NOT BACKED BY THINKING. THE ATTACKS ON ME WERE MOTIVATED BY HATRED, GREED AND ENVY.

I BOUGHT THE FIRST HOUSE AT OTTER POINT WITH ITS 12 FOOT HIGH 1200 SQUARE FOOT BASEMENT IN 1979

I WAS FULLY EQUIPPED TO START A JEWELRY MANUFACTURING BUSINESS

I had gold and silver inventory to sell, 500 ounces of Silver and 250 grams of Gold, which could kick start an enterprise where I would employ people or at least myself.

There was no other work available, logging was slowing down, there were only a few jobs in Sooke. 

When I arrived in Sooke BC, unbeknownst to me, the neighbors did not want to lose their ``LOGGER CULTURE`` and they did not want me `Yuppie`,  (young urban professional). No ``Yuppies`` were to be allowed to live here despite the fact that THE TREES WERE ALL GONE. 

I HAVE TRULY HAD A BELLYFUL OF DAMNED ETHNOCENTRIC DISCRIMINATION. I AM ALWAYS, IT SEEMS, A MINORITY OF ONE. 

MY INVENTORY WAS STOLEN, THE HOUSE WAS BURNT WITH MY FACTORY IN IT. I DID NOT YET RE-ESTABLISH ANY JEWELRY MANUFACTURING AND SALES. I HAVE THE EQUIPMENT AGAIN BUT I AM SO CRIPPLED BY THE DAMNED ATTACKS OF THE UNDERCLASS INCLUDING POLICE THAT I CANNOT DO IT NOR CAN I DO MY ART, MY MUSIC AND MY VIDEOGRAPHY.

THE FOREST AND THE MEADOW AT OTTER POINT IN NOVEMBER OF 1979

.

Looking East around the side of the house the meadow looked much like this. 

It was a brilliant warm sunny day when I took possession of my first piece of land. The grass was long and soft and brown from the sun, stretching out to the top of the hill on the North and up to a  copse of Fir on the East.

Unbelievably a thin stream of water shot into the air where the well house is now and I thought there was City Water but it was a capped and taped up Artisan well that was squirting into the air. I can feel how thrilled I was

ADVANCED METHOD JEWELRY MANUFACTURING AND THE POLICE

 

AT ADVANCED METHOD JEWELRY MANUFACTURING THE SHOP POLICY WAS TO BE NICE AND TECHNICALLY HELPFUL TO EACH AND EVERY CUSTOMER.

I had an AAA Industrial Credit Rating with the Bank of Nova Scotia.

I had letters from Immigration and Manpower Canada which described my training of an otherwise unemployable woman with disfiguring facial injury. She achieved permanent employment as the most expert Wax Impression producer whom the large manufacturer who hired her had ever encountered. I had cast 50,000 pieces of jewelry at Advanced Method. I sold it in 1979 and bought the property at Otter Point.

Shortly after August of 1979 I began to work on the unfinished and looted house and I did not really leave the house except to get building materials, varnish and paint. I worked on the house every day until June 20 1980. Somehow bad stories began to circulate about me without my ever knowing any of the local residents. 

That is far enough with this line of commentary. This Post is about my actual relationship with the only Police I had ever talked to after May of 1974 when the factory was established after I had been almost entirely at home for 4 years.

The Vancouver Police Robbery Squad came to AMJ asking about whether someone could have made a stolen chain he had. I told them to get a loupe and look at the trademarks and that the chain was made on machines only run in Italy.

WHEN A VANCOUVER POLICEMAN BECAME A DETECTIVE HE WANTED A REAL GOLD BADGE. I TOLD HIM THAT IF HE WENT TO THE BANK AND BOUGHT A PURE GOLD INGOT I COULD LAWFULLY RECAST THE INGOT AS THE BADGE HE WANTED. I MADE A RUBBER MOLD OF HIS BADGE AND INJECTED WAX AND CAST IT.

I CHARGED FOR FACTORY SERVICE  AND GAVE HIM THE MOLD. I SAID YOU ARE A POLICE OFFICER AND YOU CANNOT LET ANYONE ELSE HAVE YOUR BADGE MOLD WITHOUT YOUR BEING THERE. YOU CAN BUY WAX NUMBERS I TOLD HIM, AND THEY CAN REPLACE YOUR NUMBERS SO AS MANY OFFICERS AS SO WISH TO CAN HAVE BADGES CAST IN ANY LAWFULLY USED AND POSSESSED METAL. 

How on Earth can the RCMP listen to gossip that is intended to damage me and disparage my reputation without contacting me or anyone in Manpower and Immigration Canada or at the Bank of Nova Scotia or in the Vancouver PD?   

THE FAUX DISGRUNTLEMENT

This side had a wrinkled  rear quarter panel. Rusty scrapes and scratches covered the car.  The front passenger side had a fender crunchie and the rear bumper, quarter panel and trunk were stove in. 

. 

I REMEMBER BEING PLEASANT, POLITE AND SMILING DESPITE MY INSOLVENCY.

I HAD LOST EVERY POSSESSION IN THE ARSON IN 1980 AND I HAD NOT BY 1988  ACQUIRED PROPER CLOTHES OR SHOES.

I HAD BEEN AN UNPAID SLAVE UNDER THE CONTROL OF MY WIFE SINCE 1981.

I WAS SITTING IN A SMASHED RUSTY 1967 BUICK WARMING IT UP AND SMILING.

MY WIFE ERUPTED OUT OF THE HOUSE, DRAGGING TWO KIDS WITH HER. MY WIFE SAID "YOU ARE ALL SMILING AND HAPPY AND I AM NOT! I AM GOING TO WIPE THE SMILE OFF OF YOUR FACE."

I HAD NOTHING TO SMILE ABOUT BUT I WAS GETTING READY FOR THE ROAD, PLANNING TO DRIVE CALM. HAPPY AND NOT AGITATED.

IT WAS SHE WHO WAS DISGRUNTLED BUT IN ORDER TO CONTINUE TO DISPOSSESS ME SHE WOULD SAY I WAS DISGRUNTLED TO THE DEGREE THAT I MIGHT "FLY OFF THE HANDLE" AND FLARE UP INTO UNCONTROLLABLE VIOLENCE; THIS WAS A FALSE DECLARATION WHICH SHE BOASTED TO ME THAT SHE HAD MADE TO THE RCMP.

THE RCMP SHOULD KNOW BETTER THAN TO SPREAD UNPROVEN, COUNTERFACTUAL LIES BUT THEY DO AS A PART OF THE STANDING CONSPIRACY TO OBSTRUCT JUSTICE THROUGH COLLUSION AND OTHER UNLAWFUL ENABLING OF SOME DEMOGRAPHICS AND THEIR  ACTING PUNITIVELY TOWARDS OTHER DEMOGRAPHICS LIKE ME.

HOW NECESSARY IS "TOTAL RECALL"?

I WOULD SAY THAT TOTAL RECALL IS AN ABSOLUTE NECESSITY IF YOU NEED TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENED, WHO IS RESPONSIBLE AND HOW IT HAPPENED.

MOTHER CAME OF RAGE IN 1951

 

1951 WAS THE YEAR THAT MY MOTHER INSTITUTED SEXUAL ABSTINENCE WITH MY FATHER AND BEGAN TO BEAT ME WITH STEEL EDGED YARDSTICKS AND HICKORY BROOM HANDLES. SHE HAD COME OF RAGE, 32, AN ANGRY AGE.

I WAS NOT LL COLLARD THERE WAS NOTHING LEFT. THAT WAS NOT NOT LOW ENOUGH TO SATISFY THE PUNISHMENT SQUAD.

     BURRVILLA 

BURRVILLA WAS MY HOME BEFORE THE DESPERATION PURCHASE OF THE HOUSE AT OTTER POINT. CORRUPT GOVERNMENT OFFICIALS SOLD IT FOR ONE DOLLAR TO A MR LANG WHERE I HAD PAID $175,/MONTH FOR YEARS AND MAINTAINED IT. 

I WAS SUPPOSED TO GET TO KEEP LIVING IN THE HOUSE.

THE ONE DOLLAR PURCHASE WAS USED TO EVICT ME.

LANG WAS UNABLE TO PROPERLY MAINTAIN THE HOUSE.

I KNOW THE HOUSE'S ATTIC IS HOME TO A LARGE BAT COLONY NOW IN DEAS ISLAND PARK . I DO NOT KNOW IF ANYONE LIVES IN IT.

WAS THAT AND WHAT WENT ON THERE, THE MUSIC, ART AND DISCUSSION WHAT MY FAMILY WAS JEALOUSLY ATTACKING

WITHOUT PONDERING WHAT MOTIVATED MY FAMILY TO JOIN THE PUNISHMENT COMMUNITY, THEY WERE PUNISHING A MAN  WHO NO LONGER EXISTED.

THE FACTORY AND THE GOLD BARS AND JEWELRY WERE GONE, SOLD TO BUY LAND OR STOLEN FROM MY HOUSE.

NO MOTORCYCLES AND NO TOOLS AND NO MUSICAL EQUIPMENT OR TAPES.

I NO LONGER HELD THE SPACE JAM NOR  WAS I WHERE MY FRIENDS MET.

I HAD BEEN FORCED TO DO EXACTLY WHAT I HAD SET OUT TO NOT HAVE TO DO, ORDERED TO TO ASININE THINGS.

I DID NOT GET TO PLAY HARMONICA.

I HAD NO CLOTHING EXCEPT FOR CAR SALES AND HARD LABOR CLOTHES.

I HAD NO MONEY, HOUSE REBUILDING AND THE ENDLESS REMEDY OF THE DAMAGE DONE TO THE PROPERTY HAD TAPPED ME OUT COMPLETELY AND IT IS STILL BEING DONE TO THIS DAY.

FAMILY MEMBERS UNIVERSALLY SPOKE OF THE NEED TO FURTHER DIMINISH ME AS IF I WAS THE PROUD, PRODUCTIVE, CREATIVE, EQUIPPED, PERSON I HAD BEEN BEFORE THE ARSON AND THE THEFT AND THE LOSSES CAUSED BY THE ASININE DIVORCE BASED CONTROL EXERTED OVER ME BY MY EX WIFE.

THEY SAID THEY WERE "TAKING ME DOWN'', ENDING MY "HUBRIS", THEY WERE IMAGINING I STILL WAS LL COL...

  

A HISTORY OF COLLAPSE IMMOBILITY

 

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Lindon Collard Thu, Mar 25, 4:21 PM "Crazy Not Insane" by Dorothy O. Lewis is about the creation of Serial Killers and Psychotic Killers through physical injury and other maltreatment or mistreatm Lindon Collard Thu, Mar 25, 4:50 PM Documentary on HBO " Crazy not Insane". Lindon Collard <lindoncollard@gmail.com> Thu, Mar 25, 4:55 PM to redlinenorton View. Documentary on HBO " Crazy not Insane". "Crazy Not Insane" by Dorothy O. Lewis is about the creation of Serial Killers and Psychotic Killers  through physical injury and other maltreatment or mistreatment during childhood. New, sometimes psychotic, alternate entity persons are created to escape the maltreatment.    I definitely attended Mother Collard's Serial Killer School with high impact and pain treatment. The documentary states that shaking children, slamming them into objects or striking their heads with  anything causes brain damage in children. ( I wonder, what about contact sports?) I have at least one alternate personality or reality and it is virtually paralyzed and collapsed. That was what would happen when I was pulled to the left then right and thrown down by my hair and  jumped on by my Mother. That would crush the breath out of me.I would collapse, gasping. She struck  for no reason and without warning with brooms and steel edged yardsticks. I remember the sound of the  steel edge cutting through my hair as she struck my skull, and the taste of blood in my mouth. My left  arm has steel edge grooves all over it.  I detailed a plethora of accurate and truthful recountations of events, statements and what the results  and symptoms were. I put it into writing, animation and musical performance and what do you know, the data driven Art fits right in with the HBO Documentary and my subsequent research. When we are subjected to similar maltreatment as we experienced in childhood the obnoxious claim is  made that we brought it on ourselves, it is claimed that we mated with persons alike to our abusers, as  if we were stupidly so attracted. My siblings and my wife fell in love with the abuse still being perpetrated againdt me by my mother when I was an adult my siblings and the women who married into the Collard Family continued the stealing crimes which women do, men rape, women steal, and they lie and lie to use the "Big Beaters", POLICE.   ONE OF MY FIRST MEMORIES IS OF LAYING THERE MY CHEST LOCKED AND SHUDDERING AS  I TRIED TO BREATHE AT 2737 ALLARD, I WAS FOUR AT THE TIME. The documentary on HBO stated that personality change created during childhood trauma will manifest  then and late nother personality changing person who would sleep after his macabre acts were accomplished. I have the sleep syndrome severely, sleeping deeply several times a day and right after a live performance,  creating a cartoon, or accomplishing a  drive to Victoria, or in the past to the Ferry or from it into  Vancouver.  I detailed a plethora of accurate and truthful recountations of events, statements and what the results  and symptoms were. I put it into writing, animation and musical performance and what do you know, the data driven Art fits right in with the HBO Documentary and my subsequent research. Like I said " Those who witness child beating of a sibling fall in love with that beater and that beating"  and the mates, associates and adversaries of persons terrorized and injured as children  FALL IN LOVE WITH HANDING OUT MORE PUNISHMENT, HATRED AND PHYSICAL INJURY.  Brain injured abused persons do not, all of them, collapse like I do. Do reprisers of child maltreatment  trigger attacks on themselves, or worse, trigger attacks upon innocent person r with personality, writing, voice and facial appearance changes. I wrote several songs about Ann's personalit prisers of child maltreatment  trigger attacks on themselves, or worse, trigger attacks upon innocent persons. y changes and I wrote about her assuming a "little girl" voice. She could withdraw into cigarettes and alcohol. She exhibited changing spelling.   Some personality changed individuals are not collapsed but active and dangerous. There is a report of  another personality changing person who would sleep after his macabre acts were accomplished. I have the sleep syndrome severely, sleeping deeply several times a day and right after a live performance,  creating a cartoon, or accomplishing a  drive to Victoria, or in the past to the Ferry or from it into  Vancouver.  I detailed a plethora of accurate and truthful recountations of events, statements and what the results  and symptoms were. I put it into writing, animation and musical performance and what do you know, the data driven Art fits right in with the HBO Documentary and my subsequent research. Like I said " Those who witness child beating of a sibling fall in love with that beater and that beating"  and the mates, associates and adversaries of persons terrorized and injured as children  FALL IN LOVE WITH HANDING OUT MORE PUNISHMENT, HATRED AND PHYSICAL INJURY.  Brain injured abused persons do not, all of them, collapse like I do. Do reprisers of child maltreatment  trigger attacks on themselves, or worse, trigger attacks upon innocent persons